today, i collected my results. after one long year, one tiring, torturous, painful year. everything i have committed came down to today. i already expected myself to get a very disappointing score. that's what i say on the outside. inside, quietly, i secretly wish i would get good scores, to reward myself after a year full of tears, laughs and disappointment. i really hoped i could do well. i really wish i was rewarded with something better. " the whole level passed. " the moment i heard my principal say this line, i wanted to jump up and scream in joy. i know i won't fail, but i was so happy. i was so happy and relieved that all my friends, we overcame this obstacle.

maybe i was too unfocused, maybe i took on too many roles, maybe i was confused, maybe i wasn't serious, or maybe i just stubborn. all the 'maybes'... no one knows the reason, not even myself. too many times, my mind is clouded with 'what if's. too many times, i can't think straight. too many times, i become too stubborn. when i looked at my score, my whole heart plummeted. being with my friends suddenly made me feel so inferior, so lousy, so messy, so out-of-place. i looked at their happy faces, wondering why i was one of them. my heart took a 360degree turn, so messy. i cried in the hall, i isolated myself from the others. i cried, hugged, cried, and hugged.

i just want to say thank you to everyone who tried to cheer me up, who tried to console me. thank you for being there for me. thank you for making me smile. i'm okay now, i eventually need to move on in life. so, thank you.

(tu)lynn says:
my friends parents and i get along very well
shit
why do i sound
so
old
D:
Marilyn (&) says:
LOL.
LOLOLOLOL.
YOU'RE A MOTHER'S IDEAL DAUGHTER IN LAW

i love you marilyn tan. XD i really do.